Short screenplay for the Oct 2016 Halloween contest.

DEMON SQUAD: RESURRECTION FADE IN: INT. UNDERGROUND SEWER TUNNEL - NIGHT Old brick walls, stained with damp. Light comes from flickering ancient lamps set in the ceiling. A bandaged EGYPTIAN MUMMY shuffles past, and continues along the tunnel. A guy dressed in black tip-toes after the Mummy. His name's HORST. His grim expression says he means business. Horst grabs the Mummy from behind and twists its head off, a brutal SNAP. The Mummy collapses into a pile of bones and old bandages. Horst looks around, making sure no one saw or heard. He crouches down and starts pulling away the bandages. He finds the Mummy's hand and removes a silver ring from one of the fingers. He holds the ring up and examines it with interest. He sniffs a bandage strip. Eww, stinky. He starts to wrap the bandage around his own head, making himself into the Mummy. INT. ARCHED DOORWAY - NIGHT A huge, hairy CHEWBACCA lookalike and a KNIGHT in armor with lowered helmet visor guard the door. They perk up as the Mummy approaches. It looks as if they might stop the Mummy... But the Mummy holds up his hand, showing the silver ring. Chewbacca pushes the door open. The Mummy shuffles through. INT. ENTRANCE CHAMBER - NIGHT The Mummy enters through the arched doorway. Chewbacca and the Knight stay on guard, their backs to us. The door slowly swings shut, hiding them from view. Close on the Mummy. Horst's eyes flick left and right. INT. CONFERENCE CHAMBER - NIGHT A long table with chairs on either side, plus extra chairs at each end. The chairs are occupied by people wearing Halloween costumes. There's a Frankenstein Monster... a fanged Werewolf... a pointy-hatted Witch... a reptilian Creature from the Black Lagoon... a white-sheeted Ghost with black spots for eyes... a fanged Vampire in a stylish black and red cloak... a green-skinned Zombie with ripped, bloody clothing... a Ninja assassin in a black suit and ski mask... a Pumpkin-headed guy with weird long fingers... a grinning-faced Skeleton made of bones... and a huge Gorilla, who sits at the head of the table. They have one thing in common, they all wear a silver ring like the one Horst took from the dead Mummy. Members of the same club. The Gorilla turns his head as the Mummy enters. GORILLA You're late! Take your seat. The Mummy (Horst) shuffles to the table and sits down, he's at the other end of the table, facing the Gorilla. GORILLA Now that we are all present, I call this annual meeting of the Dark Brotherhood to order. WITCH Once again, I move for that outdated name to be changed. Given that there are three in this chamber who do not qualify as "brothers". The Gorilla face-palms. GORILLA Jesus H. Christ, Lizzie, do we gotta do this every goddamned year? WOLFMAN Three? The Creature and the Ghost raise their hands. CREATURE Raaarrrgggg! GHOST I'm trans but I identify as female. The Skeleton also raises a hand. SKELETON Asexual, here. No boner jokes please. The Gorilla bunches his huge fists, trying not to pop a vein. GORILLA Okay, okay. If we have time, we'll put the name change thing to a vote. We're wasting the one night of the year we can move freely among the humans. WOLFMAN Who never suspect the truth, until it is too late! Everyone at the table throws their heads back and laughs uproariously. Or, depending on what they are, they snarl or hiss. VAMPIRE I had a snack on the way here, as I am sure you all did. She became amorous, and asked me to take out my fangs. Take out my fangs! More laughter and hissing! Horst, disguised as the Mummy, is the only one who isn't amused. The laughter dies away. GORILLA First item on the agenda. Territorial disputes. Desmond, you have a complaint to put before the Dark Brotherhood? The Witch opens her mouth to say something but the Gorilla holds up a warning finger, she shuts her mouth. WOLFMAN Damn right I do. The goddamn zombies won't stick to their own turf. They've been raiding into ours, killing our livestock. Turning them into their own foul kind. ZOMBIE Oh, the lies. It is wolves who raid zombie territory. WOLFMAN You stink and you taste foul, we can't eat your dead flesh, why would we raid you? GORILLA Why indeed? This sounds like a no-brainer. (to Zombie) Do you deny encroaching upon the werewolf quarter? ZOMBIE Zombies do not raid wolf territory. GORILLA The punishment for territorial infringement is clear. The offending group must forfeit a portion of its territory, and the leader of the offending group must pay the harshest penalty. The Gorilla signals. An armored Knight steps out of the shadows, holding a huge broadsword. The Knight moves to stand behind the Zombie and raises his broadsword, ready to strike. The Werewolf grins savagely, this is just what he wanted. ZOMBIE Why zombies always face injustice? The Gorilla makes a chopping motion with his hand. The Knight brings his broadsword down onto the Werewolf instead, shattering his chair and bursting him wide open. Gore spatters. GORILLA The Dark Brotherhood sees everything. The Dark Brotherhood knows everything. Twenty percent of the werewolf quarter will be ceded to the zombie community, to do with as they will. VAMPIRE Such is our law. GORILLA Item 2 on the agenda. Giant squids from the Pacific Ocean depths have applied to join the Dark Brotherhood. Your thoughts? FRANKENSTEIN MONSTER Do we really want Cthulhu spawn sitting at this table? GORILLA They do worship the Old Ones but it's my understanding that they are not Cthulhu spawn, per se, but an Earth-evolved aquatic culture in their own right. PUMPKIN HEAD GUY Can they physically manifest themselves here? The chamber would have to be flooded. WITCH Magics can be worked to provide a contained ocean environment. CREATURE Raaargg uurrgh! WITCH You're am amphibian, you can function perfectly well on land as well as in your own lagoon. (to Gorilla) The squids do possess arcane knowledge that would be useful to us. GORILLA Then we shall take a vote. Those in favor of the giant squids of the Pacific Ocean joining the Dark Brotherhood, raise your hand. Or any appendage. INT. UNDERGROUND SEWER TUNNEL - NIGHT The remains of the Mummy that Horst killed. Chewbacca's huge hairy feet step into shot. The deception is discovered! INT. CONFERENCE CHAMBER - NIGHT GORILLA Next order of business-- A Knight leans down to whisper into the Gorilla's ear. The Gorilla listens, then dismisses the Knight. GORILLA It seems an infiltrator has been found. The Gorilla stares directly at Horst. Beneath the table, Horst's hand reaches into loose bandages and pulls out a Heckler & Koch MP5. WITCH An infiltrator? GORILLA She was caught while trying to sneak into our lair. Our guards are bringing her here now. Horst's eyes widen, they're not talking about him. The doors fly open and two armored Knights drag in CINDY, painfully pretty but with eyes as hard as steel. She struggles to get free but the Knights are too strong for her. The Vampire likes what he sees, he licks his lips in anticipation. VAMPIRE How strange that a human would wish to come to us, instead of fleeing for their life. GORILLA Strange indeed. (to Cindy) You have dared interrupt the proceedings of the Dark Brotherhood. You will explain yourself, or suffer the consequences. CINDY Screw you, Harambe. WITCH If it pleases the chair, I will work my magic on her. She will experience such pain that she will beg for death, and tell us everything. VAMPIRE There is no need for such barbarity. The Vampire stands and glides over to Cindy. He smiles. His eyes glow. Cindy tries to look away, but she's mesmerized by his power. VAMPIRE Tell me who you are, my dear, and vy you haf chosen to risk your soul by violating the sanctity of the Dark Brotherhood? HORST (Austrian accent) She's with me. Cindy's eyes flick to Horst. She recognizes that voice! Horst stands, his Mummy bandages tumble off him. He points his MP5 at the Gorilla. GORILLA Another infiltrator! Tell me, do you think your puny human weapons will actually work against any of us here in this chamber? The creatures all have a good chuckle. Horst pulls back the MP5's slide. HORST I always load up with silver bullets when I go hunting on Halloween. The Gorilla's eyes widen. Eek! DAKA DAKA DAKA! Horst sprays bullets everywhere. The Witch shrieks as she's shredded, the Pumpkin head explodes, the Skeleton comes apart, the Ghost spatters the walls with green mucus ectoplasm. Cindy butts the Vampire, he reels back and knocks heads with the Ninja, stunning him. Cindy elbows both Knights in their visors, snatches the Ninja's sword and decapitates him with a swishing stroke! The Vampire holds up both hands in surrender. VAMPIRE No, vait-- Swish! His head tumbles through the air, eyes wide in shock. The hissing Creature from the Black Lagoon lumbers at Cindy, claws reaching for her. HORST Watch out for the poison claws! Cindy side-steps and the Creature staggers into the two Knights, bowling them over. Cindy grasps the sword with both hands and stabs the Creature in the back, skewering it. It screams, sinks to its knees, pitches over. The Gorilla runs for the door, Horst tracks him and shoots, the Gorilla cartwheels into a stone pillar and sinks down, leaving bloody smears. The Frankenstein Monster flips the table over and charges at Horst -- who runs out of bullets! Click-click! Horst throws the empty MP5 at the Frankenstein Monster, who swats it aside like a fly and grabs Horst by the throat. Horst struggles with the huge hands but can't get free. He knows he's going to lose. The Frankenstein Monster grins horribly. He knows he's going to win. Something shocks the Monster, his eyes widen, his grin vanishes. The Creature's severed hands are stuck into his neck -- the poison claws buried in his reanimated flesh. The Frankenstein Monster's eyelids flutter. He lets go of Horst, who only just manages to step aside before the Monster collapses like a falling tree, making a hell of a noise. Cindy throws the sword -- the blade enters the visor of the Knight with the broadsword, who was about to attack them. The Knight collapses. Cindy helps Horst, who's weakened by his struggle with the Monster. CINDY Come on, let's get out of here. They run to the door and exit the chamber. INT. UNDERGROUND SEWER TUNNEL - NIGHT Cindy and Horst jog along. FREEZE FRAME. SUPER: DEMON SQUAD INT. CONFERENCE CHAMBER - NIGHT The Chewbacca lookalike stands in the doorway, staring at the devastation and corpses. He tilts his head back and roars at the heavens: CHEWBACCA RAAAARGH! (English subtitle) Vengeance! FADE OUT Oct 2016

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