Short screenplay from the Done Deal Halloween contest. "Extra Time" FADE IN: EXT. FOGGY CEMETERY - NIGHT A sea of tombstones under a bright full Moon. EXT. OUTSIDE THE CEMETERY GATES - NIGHT KYLIE, a cheerleader hottie, ED, a skinny nerd with glasses, and DESDEMONIA, a Goth chick, stand outside the locked gates. Ed rattles the padlock and chain. ED I g-guess that settles it. Kylie pushes past him, climbs up and over, lands and strikes a cheerleader "TA-RAH!" pose. KYLIE Come on team, let's go. Ed reluctantly climbs. His pants get snagged at the top. Kylie sighs with exasperation and turns away. THUMP. Ed's lying on the ground. He picks himself up. KYLIE Keep the noise down. ED Sorry. Desdemonia fans out her long lacy skirt and shows her shiny black spike heel boots. DESDEMONIA And just how do you expect me to climb wearing these? KYLIE Maybe you should have brought your broomstick? Kylie sets off among the tombstones. Ed's torn between following her and waiting for Desdemonia. DESDEMONIA You better go after your girlfriend. ED She's not really my girlfriend. DESDEMONIA Well, duh. Ed hurries after Kylie and disappears. DESDEMONIA Jesus! Fuckin nerd! EXT. THE GRAVE - NIGHT Ed joins Kylie. They stare at a tombstone. KYLIE So young. So tragic. ED I didn't know him very well. KYLIE Davy was everything you're not. Handsome, muscular, tanned, buff. ED Thanks. KYLIE He loved playing football. It was his life. ED Then he died doing something he loved. We should all be so lucky. KYLIE Lucky? He broke his neck, you dork. ED Well, yeah, but... KYLIE The last fuckin minute of the game and ten guys pile on top of him, and that makes him lucky? ED That's not what I meant... Desdemonia arrives fussing over a giant tear in her skirt. DESDEMONIA Thanks for helping me, guys. Not. KYLIE You're the one who wanted to come along, Sally-Ann. DESDEMONIA There is no Sally-Ann any more, I have renounced that identity. Society has no right to impose its labels upon me. I am Desdemonia, Mistress of the Night. KYLIE Shouldn't you be out trick-or-treating somewhere? DESDEMONIA I'm meeting up with friends later. We're going to scare the shit out of some kids. KYLIE You're so cool. Where's the book? Ed pulls out THE BOOK, bound in dark leather, with gold lettering on the cover, flowing squiggles and loops. DESDEMONIA Can I see it? KYLIE Don't touch it. The Book of the Dead must be treated with reverence. ED We found it on E-Bay. DESDEMONIA You bought a Book of the Dead off the internet? ED Bidding was intense. I maxed out my mom's card. She's going to hit the roof when she finds out. DESDEMONIA What does it say? Can you actually read it? KYLIE Of course we can read it. ED I scanned the pages and translated it online. There's this Egyptology site with ancient c-curses and all k- kinds of weird shit... KYLIE Just show her. Ed opens the cover and takes out several printed sheets. They slip out of his hand and fall everywhere. Everyone bends to pick them up. KYLIE You klutz! Can't you be more careful? Desdemonia reads a couple of sheets. DESDEMONIA Wow, cool beans. Kylie snatches them off her and gives the sheets to Ed. KYLIE The words must not be read aloud. Not yet. DESDEMONIA What are we waiting for? KYLIE Midnight. DESDEMONIA That's hours away! Can't we do it now? Kylie looks doubtful. ED You know, it's already midnight in other parts of the world. And the full Moon is at zenith. And it is Halloween... DESDEMONIA All Hallows Eve. When a portal opens between the mortal world and the shadow world, allowing the living and the dead to pass in either direction with impunity. KYLIE Why thank you Buffy, that's very helpful. Okay, let's do it. ED There's just a slight problem... DESDEMONIA You're not chickening out are you, Ed? She clucks and flaps her arms, chicken-style. KYLIE You know, it becomes increasingly more obvious why you do girls. That look just isn't a turn-on to men. DESDEMONIA Eat me. KYLIE Noooooooo thank you! What is the problem? ED I didn't bring the knife. My mom was in the kitchen. I didn't want her to think I was in a gang or something. KYLIE You didn't bring the knife. You DIDN'T BRING THE KNIFE. Kylie grabs Ed and pulls him nose to nose. KYLIE You asshole, how are we supposed to shed blood if you didn't bring the fuckin knife? DESDEMONIA Whoa there, butch. Let the kid go. KYLIE Butt out, lesbian bitch. DESDEMONIA Did you guys ever see The Hunger? Kylie and Ed share a "Huh?" moment. DESDEMONIA Catherine Deneuve, most beautiful woman ever, she plays this immortal vampire, only there's no fangs, that would be très uncool. She slashes her victim's neck open with a knife hidden in her ring. Desdemonia shows them her ring, a big silver skull. She twists it open and a half-inch blade gleams. KYLIE Holy shit, the bitch is packing. DESDEMONIA You want blood? You only had to ask. KYLIE Sweetie, I take it all back. You are a useful human being after all. Kylie lets go of Ed and smoothes out the creases. KYLIE Got a little carried away there. Sorry. ED That's okay. DESDEMONIA So how is this supposed to work? ED We read a verse from the Book of the Dead, the "resurrectus necros," and we give our blood unto the earth. Then we c-call upon the power of Book of the Dead, the Moon, and the c-cosmos. I think. DESDEMONIA I'm not picking up a c-confidence vibe here. ED I'm a little nervous. It's my first time bringing someone back from the dead. And this place spooks me. KYLIE The sooner it's over, the sooner you go home. DESDEMONIA So we all have to shed blood? Ed checks the sheets. ED Yeah, it says everyone who's present at the ceremony must give. DESDEMONIA Cool. KYLIE I swear, if I get H.I.V. from that shitty tin ring I'll scratch your eyes out. DESDEMONIA Relax, I only use it to clean my toenails. KYLIE Gross. ED I'm gonna read the verse, okay? DESDEMONIA You speak ancient Egyptian? ED The language isn't important, it's the intention that matters. Okay, are we ready? As soon as I finish, you c-cut me, her, you. KYLIE Cut me first. DESDEMONIA Gladly. ED (reading sheet) Deliver unto us... from a distant place... that which rests here... let him come forth... let him hear the call... of what he desires most. Pause... DESDEMONIA Is that it? ED Yeah. DESDEMONIA Hold out your hands. Desdemonia slashes Kylie's hand, Kylie YELPS! She slashes Ed's hand, he sucks in air. She slowly draws the ring across her own palm, making a red line. DESDEMONIA I give my blood unto the earth. She holds her hand over the grave, blood drips. Ed does the same. Then Kylie. Drip drip drip. DESDEMONIA We call upon the power of the Book of the Dead, and the Moon, and the cosmos. We invoke the resurrectus necros. ED You're a natural. DESDEMONIA I have an affinity for these things. KYLIE Shut UP! Shouldn't something be happening? DESDEMONIA How long does it usually take? Ed flips through the Book. ED It doesn't say. M-maybe I should have translated the next chapter. DESDEMONIA Will he be, you know, dead? As in, a corpse? All icky and stinky? KYLIE Eeew! That's not how it works! ED He'll come back as we remember him. That's what the Book says. KYLIE When he gets here? You guys need to take a hike. Me and Davy have things to talk about. Private things. DESDEMONIA Uh-huh. You know, screwing a dead guy has got to be the height of desperation. A good-looking girl like you could do better. You need to move on. KYLIE I can't move on. I love him. That's it. Go ahead, laugh if you want, I don't care. DESDEMONIA Nobody's laughing, honeybunny. I hope it works out. KYLIE Of course it'll work out. A low RUMBLING noise builds. They quickly step back from the grave. KYLIE Oh. My. God. It's working. He's coming back. Davy's coming back! THE GRAVE BURSTS OPEN, showering them with earth! A helmet-wearing football JOCK leaps up, grabs the Book of the Dead from Ed and runs off through the graveyard, ducking and dodging as if the tombstones are opposing players diving to stop him. He vanishes into the night. KYLIE What the fuck? DESDEMONIA He's gone. KYLIE Gone where? I'm right here! ED I never saw anyone move so fast... KYLIE I'M RIGHT HERE! I'm right here. Dammit. DESDEMONIA I guess he heard the call. KYLIE Why didn't you stop him? ED Why didn't you? Kylie belts him on the jaw, Ed goes down. Desdemonia steps between them. DESDEMONIA Don't you get it? Your boyfriend came back for what he desired most. KYLIE You don't know what you're talking about! Just look at you, dressed like a ho, and you, weed-oh. You clowns distracted him. I should have done this alone. Kylie runs off after the jock, her voice fading. KYLIE Davy! Daaaaay-veeeee! Come back here, you son of a bitch! Desdemonia helps Ed stand, and brushes him down. ED What's she mad at me for? DESDEMONIA It's Halloween. People go a little crazy. Come on, let's go get a coffee or something. ED Are you sure? I thought you were, you know. DESDEMONIA Nah, I just say that to keep the goofballs away. I like skinny guys. The skeletal look, you know? ED What if she doesn't find him? DESDEMONIA What the hell. There's always next year. They leave together. FADE OUT: The End. 10/05§